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God Is Dead ... Again

Lincoln Cannon

16 October 2005 (updated 20 December 2023)

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"Mundane Hearse of God" by Lincoln Cannon

Remember this scene from Monty Python and the Holy Grail?

MORTICIAN: Bring out your dead! Bring out your dead! [clang] Bring out your dead! [clang] Bring out your dead! [clang] Bring out your dead! [clang] Bring out your dead!

CUSTOMER: Here’s one – nine pence.

DEAD PERSON: I’m not dead!


CUSTOMER: Nothing – here’s your nine pence.

DEAD PERSON: I’m not dead!

MORTICIAN: Here – he says he’s not dead!

CUSTOMER: Yes, he is.


MORTICIAN: He isn’t.

CUSTOMER: Well, he will be soon, he’s very ill.

DEAD PERSON: I’m getting better!

CUSTOMER: No, you’re not – you’ll be stone dead in a moment.

MORTICIAN: Oh, I can’t take him like that – it’s against regulations.

DEAD PERSON: I don’t want to go on the cart!

CUSTOMER: Oh, don’t be such a baby.

MORTICIAN: I can’t take him.

DEAD PERSON: I feel fine!

CUSTOMER: Oh, do us a favor.


CUSTOMER: Well, can you hang around a couple of minutes? He won’t be long.

MORTICIAN: Naaah, I got to go on to Robinson’s – they’ve lost nine today.

CUSTOMER: Well, when is your next round?

MORTICIAN: Thursday.

DEAD PERSON: I think I’ll go for a walk.

CUSTOMER: You’re not fooling anyone y’know. Look, isn’t there something you can do?

DEAD PERSON: I feel happy. I feel happy.


CUSTOMER: Ah, thanks very much.

MORTICIAN: Not at all. See you on Thursday.


God is dead. Well, at least God is supposed to be dead. So we whop God. We crucify and deconstruct God.

But, each time, God comes back, as if rising from the dead more powerful than before. How does God do this? Ironically, it seems the very hand raised to whop the dying God is the sign of the oath to the resurrecting God.

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